NaNoWriMo Plot Thoughts -- SPOILERS!!

[msirois]

Mikey = blue

a.r.dobbs wrote:
I also think Fulvia needs to be Trevor's age or younger, not 60+. Maybe you meant another name there? I definitely hope so.

I was assuming (at first, before Alan's reply above) that if Fulvia was Theresia's grand-daughter, she must be a generation (twenty years) younger. I was mixing T.M. up with Charles, I guess. But illegitimate daughter, conceived when T.M. was in his twenties or thirties would work(she could easily be thirty to Trevor's forty).
T.M. is Trevor's grandfather, not his father. So he's in 50s when fathering Fulvia. Theresia: 100. T.M.: 80. T&T 40ish. Fulvia 30ish.

I don't have any idea what flesh in a cuniform cylinder is referring to.

I'm reading that as an actual piece of Missou flesh, carefully preserved so as to maintain the integrity of its DNA. Maybe this is pre-disorder flesh, and can be used to ensure (through some kind of medical miracle thingamajiggy) to rid the Missou descendants of the auto-immune disorder.

BTW, is it Missou or Missous, and is it Tracy or Tracey? Those pairs of names will be indistinguishible from each other when read, but on the screen could be confusing.

So how do they know they're going to Malta? or the Malta area? How did they figure that out?

A good guess on Tracey's part? Malta is/was the headquarters, and maybe still is? Dunno.

Was the chip removed from Fulvia? A sentence or two about that would be good.

Yes, it would. Because (if I'm not mistaken, activating the chip could result in messy wallpaper, etc., right?
The chip was activated -- end of chap 28 has Fulvia writhing; explains the chip: doesn't explode, causes incapacitating pain.

So Prazak has no clues for them?
One consistency error -- Gerhardt is in the compound again, but he'd been flying with Prazak at the close of chap 27.

I read that as saying that they had discussed things while enroute, then returned Prazak to California, and he was speaking to them (on the phone) from his home.

Plenty to do in 30.
But again, please, it is too weird to have Fulvia be in the family. There's no setup for that, and lots of setup for other developments instead.

It will leave us lots of 'splaining to do.

[Cloud Mountain]

Were you taking requests for chap 29?

If so, I request that somebody explain how flesh comes to be in a cuneform cylindar.
And how somebody knows that it's in Malta.

And could you suggest how Fulvia has recovered from the chip that had her writhing?
(And really, Tracey is holding her hand?)

Just a consistency note: the manuscript to Prazak was conceived to be pages 10-30 or so of a much larger manuscript. It is now conceived to be ... a single sheet of papyrus?

I still haven't recorded 27. If you want something communicated from Prazak or mentioned about Top's connection to Fulvia... it could be squeezed in. But we should reveal now to chap 30 authors what those facts would be. Otherwise ... ... we'll be inconsistent.

MUST run for now.

He speaking of but one piece of the manuscript.
Just as in Egypt, body parts were mumified or otherwise saved. There are little pieces of every Pope's heart buried in the Vatican (well not in modern times) and so on. Mankind has done these things.

Novels don't instruct. [! ? ! the heck they don't wasn't asking for a manual, just a little segue is all, sheesh --guess who]

Don't think we need Prazak to communicate anything in a previous chapter.

Like you --this is a busy day. But folks... keep those cards and letters rolling in...

[a.r.dobbs]

Okay, I guess it's all covered then. A couple notes in red in Michael's post above. I'm finally out the door one minute after posting this, gone the day.

Happy writing all! -- I'll record my chap tonight and write one of the late endings. I hope that TBOL3 and Kathleen are able to give us a couple great endings tonight! The early arrivals! Looking forward to that reading!!

(Or should chap 30 writers refrain from reading other chap 30s till their chap is written? Hmm... a moral dilemma.)

[msirois]

(Or should chap 30 writers refrain from reading other chap 30s till their chap is written? Hmm... a moral dilemma.)

I don't plan to read anyone else's before writing mine. It's too easy to conscript ideas.

Not that I actually have an idea of my own at the moment!!!!

[Cloud Mountain]

Okay, I guess it's all covered then. A couple notes in red in Michael's post above. I'm finally out the door one minute after posting this, gone the day.

Happy writing all! -- I'll record my chap tonight and write one of the late endings. I hope that TBOL3 and Kathleen are able to give us a couple great endings tonight! The early arrivals! Looking forward to that reading!!

(Or should chap 30 writers refrain from reading other chap 30s till their chap is written? Hmm... a moral dilemma.)

yes. I'm looking forward to TBOL3's & Kathleen's chapters as welllllllll! (or is that weeeeeeeeel!)

[kristin]

Where did the information of there being "flesh" in the cylinder come from. The first mention I can find of it is Trevor telling Tracy to say FLESH?

Granted Theresia tells them later but where did this knowledge come from in the first place? That's quite a leap to make when guessing what might be in a cuneiform cylinder. And how does Theresia know anything about it anyway?

[msirois]

Alan--

Maybe you need to add a little dialogue right after they get off the phone with Prazak that reveals what they've been talking about. Something to let the readers know that they discovered the secret of the cuneiform cylinder, and why it's in Malta, etc. Something like that.

Michael

[Cloud Mountain]

Where did the information of there being "flesh" in the cylinder come from. The first mention I can find of it is Trevor telling Tracy to say FLESH?

Granted Theresia tells them later but where did this knowledge come from in the first place? That's quite a leap to make when guessing what might be in a cuneiform cylinder. And how does Theresia know anything about it anyway?

Maybe you need to add a little dialogue right after they get off the phone with Prazak that reveals what they've been talking about. Something to let the readers know that they discovered the secret of the cuneiform cylinder, and why it's in Malta, etc. Something like that.

Consider these questions answered and added. I will not be able to actually work on this until AFTER 6 tonight. Don't think that HOW they'll be answered of much significance, just that they were adressed. (Does that sound right to you.) There are other gaps in the writing as well that have to be filled in as well, but they are structural, not story line Thanks for the input.

Sorry about this, but I also had last night the pleasure of sorting through the drafts and preperations of my three classes so that they could start writing THEIR Chap 30's today. (Yes, they're still lost and it will take a few more days before they come up with something solid in narrative story form, with dialog. [And then we have to record it!] ) Ha!

[msirois]

BTW, Alan--

I wrote an explanation for how they convinced Top to meet with them in my Chapter 30. Does this jive at all with your explanation of how they knew to meet him on Lampedusa? Here's the bit I've written about that.

------------------

Using Trevor’s hacking skills, they were able to get a signal through the GLOBAL network for Top to call Fulvia. The message was that she had turned Trevor, that he now saw how futile it was to compete against the system that was currently wreaking havoc across the globe, and he wanted to join forces.

Top would be suspicious of the call, of course, certain that it could be a trap, but everyone hoped his ego would get the better of him. He was to was to call the number of a specially designed secure phone that The Order’s electronics crew had been working on for nearly a decade. The original design was intended to be used as a scrambler for secure face-to-face conversations, preventing other agents from eavesdropping on you with remote microphones or bugs. As the design developed, they could see that it might have some other uses, and one in particular intrigued Trevor. It involved transmitting data disguised as the received signal from a remote location.

The phone call did come, and The Order’s techies didn’t try to shunt the signal through too many channels. They allowed GLOBAL’s system to track the signal – through a series of poorly disguised decoys – back to the compound. Fulvia was very convincing, letting Top believe that his massive data scramble had convinced Trevor that the world would be powerless against GLOBAL, and that he felt he couldn’t compete against them. Top agreed to meet with them, and suggested either Malta or the island of Lampedusa. They agreed to call him back when they were underway. Theresia had suggested in their meeting that Lampedusa would be the safer of the two, and Trevor agreed – for reasons that were obvious to him, if no one else.

When Top was speaking, his digital signal was mirrored much in the same way that noise cancelling microphones and headphones operated. The duplicate signal, in effect, became an undetectable channel to send data in small packets back to the source of the original sound. If they could get the right data embedded somewhere in GLOBAL’s system, it could be all they need to turn the tables on Top. The downside was that they would have to be at GLOBAL’s headquarters to carry out the rest of the plan, and that would probably mean certain death if they didn’t succeed.

-----------------

What do you think? Will that work?

Michael

[Cloud Mountain]

BTW, Alan--

I wrote an explanation for how they convinced Top to meet with them in my Chapter 30. Does this jive at all with your explanation of how they knew to meet him on Lampedusa? Here's the bit I've written about that.

------------------

Using Trevor’s hacking skills, they were able to get a signal through the GLOBAL network for Top to call Fulvia. The message was that she had turned Trevor, that he now saw how futile it was to compete against the system that was currently wreaking havoc across the globe, and he wanted to join forces.

Top would be suspicious of the call, of course, certain that it could be a trap, but everyone hoped his ego would get the better of him. He was to was to call the number of a specially designed secure phone that The Order’s electronics crew had been working on for nearly a decade. The original design was intended to be used as a scrambler for secure face-to-face conversations, preventing other agents from eavesdropping on you with remote microphones or bugs. As the design developed, they could see that it might have some other uses, and one in particular intrigued Trevor. It involved transmitting data disguised as the received signal from a remote location.

The phone call did come, and The Order’s techies didn’t try to shunt the signal through too many channels. They allowed GLOBAL’s system to track the signal – through a series of poorly disguised decoys – back to the compound. Fulvia was very convincing, letting Top believe that his massive data scramble had convinced Trevor that the world would be powerless against GLOBAL, and that he felt he couldn’t compete against them. Top agreed to meet with them, and suggested either Malta or the island of Lampedusa. They agreed to call him back when they were underway. Theresia had suggested in their meeting that Lampedusa would be the safer of the two, and Trevor agreed – for reasons that were obvious to him, if no one else.

When Top was speaking, his digital signal was mirrored much in the same way that noise cancelling microphones and headphones operated. The duplicate signal, in effect, became an undetectable channel to send data in small packets back to the source of the original sound. If they could get the right data embedded somewhere in GLOBAL’s system, it could be all they need to turn the tables on Top. The downside was that they would have to be at GLOBAL’s headquarters to carry out the rest of the plan, and that would probably mean certain death if they didn’t succeed.

-----------------

What do you think? Will that work?

Michael

I like this. It is quite complex. I think it will work, even with the added subtleties I've just updated in the FINAL draft. (Yes, it is just now finally, suddenly THERE.)

You should probably read it.

I believe that what you're proposing will work.

But, with what I have planned, just realizing it AFTER I wrote what I wrote that mt ending's answer will be much simpler. (I must say, it's too simple to be good. Or maybe it's too good to seem so simple.) But that's me.

Again. I think what you have will work.

(I really wish dearie A. could be with us through this. But she's no doubt secretly composing her own masterpiece.

I don't plan to start on mine until Fri evening. (I have three classes to whip into shape [70 kiddies] and I need to conserve my energy.)

[Cloud Mountain]

M— Your messaging system seems like a combination of wireless cable DSL.

[Cloud Mountain]

MS— If Trev could at one place in time be on one computer and make Global think he was on another across the globe, why couldn't he also mirror Global's system onto his own computer, wherever that might be. More than likely in the plane going across, The plane'd have the best technology I suspect. But then it IS a Missous (masseuse?) villa.

[Cloud Mountain]

I hope that TBOL3 and Kathleen are able to give us a couple great endings tonight!

Kathleen, do you intend to post? I don't see you listed among the Googlites.

[msirois]

Answer to the remote messaging questions above -- because they have to get into the physical presence of the cuneiform cylinder.

[Cloud Mountain]

Answer to the remote messaging questions above -- because they have to get into the physical presence of the cuneiform cylinder.

Well, if that's your approach, they'll have to get Top to bring it (them) with him.

I on the other hand have a very different approach, which I cannot, of course, give away.

I'm sorry I'm not being helpful.