Wow, Eli, you are such a good reader! I loved the way you did the voices (I like to read, but I don't really know how to do voices, so it is always so cool when I get to listen to someone who can do voices!). So, the voices, the pacing, everything here sounds great!
The one thing that needs fixing is a technical thing, which is the volume for a patch of the recording where you can see it is a lot lower in volume; maybe you moved your head or moved the mic or something...? Anyway, I ran the file through the Checker and it alerted me that there was a problem with the volume. If you didn't install the Checker yet, definitely do that: it is so helpful!
https://wiki.librivox.org/index.php/Checker
(I use a Chromebook and it even works on my Chromebook, which is really cool; there's a link there on that wiki page which goes to the download and installation instructions for Windows, Mac, Linux, Chromebook)
If you look at the audio file, you'll see where it drops off to a lower volume and then picks back up again. I don't know what editor you are using, but I use TwistedWave (a browser-based editor, which works great for me because... Chromebook) -- and so I put your file in Twisted Wave and it turned out if I amplified that low-volume segment by 6db, then I got a file that passed the Checker. Here's a link to that edited file so you can see what it looks like after editing, with the volume more even throughout:
https://drive.google.com/file/d/1Xs8KrjFkmPl6jU7GK4PdMTYIBZoDCMUu/view?usp=sharing
(that's a file in my Google Drive, and you should be able to access it, download it, and then upload it into your audio editor so you can literally "see" the difference between the two files in the shape of the audio wave)
Whatever audio editor you use, there should be a way to open your recording, highlight a segment where you can see that the volume is very low and then "amplify" by choosing how much to amplify. Or it might be a fancy program with some kind of algorithm that figures it out for you, ha ha. TwistedWave is not fancy at all... but when I amplified that segment by 6db, I could see that it was in line with the rest of the file, and sure enough, it passed the Checker.
So, definitely don't stress about this: hopefully this can be a chance for you to see how the Checker works and learn how to use your audio editor to tweak the volume... but if you get stuck, we can use the edited file that I made, no problem. Either way is good!
If without too much trouble you can edit your file to pass the Checker, that will be great; you can just upload that file (same name as before), and then let me know here at the forum that you uploaded the new file. If you get stuck or have questions, let me know and I'll try to help... or we can find help from a more experienced person (all this audio editing is totally new to me, and I'm still figuring out things as I go along; I have a lot of trouble with background noise at my place, so I use the Checker religiously!). And like I said, definitely don't stress about it: your reading sounded great, and we can always just use the file I edited.
And thank you again for the great reading; the voices sound soooooo good!