~OPEN [DR] Stand By For Mars! - thw

Plays and other dramatic works
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loon
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Post by loon »

abratch wrote: April 18th, 2024, 9:04 am Al James Chapter 11
https://librivox.org/uploads/toddhw/standbyformars_AlJames_11.mp3
abratch wrote: April 18th, 2024, 9:05 am Al James Chapter 12
https://librivox.org/uploads/toddhw/standbyformars_AlJames_12.mp3
Chapters 11 and 12 are PL OK.
Note: if this were a standard chapter your volume would have been much too low (say, 9 dB too low) to pass PL. Your recording is plenty clean, so I can boost the level as I edit the chapters.
Rich Brown - Minneapolis, MN
loon
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Post by loon »

abratch wrote: April 18th, 2024, 9:05 am Al James Chapter 14
https://librivox.org/uploads/toddhw/standbyformars_AlJames_14.mp3
There is a missing line. Jim, our narrator, pointed out I was wrong to assign
"How many jet boats do you have?"
to Steve Strong when it clearly belongs to Al James.

You apparently recorded your lines for the chapter before I got that fix into the chapter script. Could you please record "how many jet boats do you have?", splice it into your chapter 14 recording and upload again under the same file name.

When he appears in chapter 11 Al James sounds like he might have merely been hired by the spaceliner company to look snappy in a big pointy hat and a coat covered in gold doodads. But in chapter 14 James shows himself to be ready to do what's needed to protect passenger (and crew) lives.
Rich Brown - Minneapolis, MN
abratch
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Post by abratch »

loon wrote: April 18th, 2024, 11:10 am
abratch wrote: April 18th, 2024, 9:05 am Al James Chapter 14
https://librivox.org/uploads/toddhw/standbyformars_AlJames_14.mp3
There is a missing line. Jim, our narrator, pointed out I was wrong to assign
"How many jet boats do you have?"
to Steve Strong when it clearly belongs to Al James.

You apparently recorded your lines for the chapter before I got that fix into the chapter script. Could you please record "how many jet boats do you have?", splice it into your chapter 14 recording and upload again under the same file name.

When he appears in chapter 11 Al James sounds like he might have merely been hired by the spaceliner company to look snappy in a big pointy hat and a coat covered in gold doodads. But in chapter 14 James shows himself to be ready to do what's needed to protect passenger (and crew) lives.
Yup, missed that.
Here is the corrected file:
https://librivox.org/uploads/toddhw/standbyformars_AlJames_14.mp3
loon
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Post by loon »

abratch wrote: April 18th, 2024, 11:37 am Yup, missed that.
Here is the corrected file:
https://librivox.org/uploads/toddhw/standbyformars_AlJames_14.mp3
Yep, yep, yep. The moment the hatch opens and Strong steps in, Al James is ready to get started on rescuing the passengers. Just right, PL OK.
Rich Brown - Minneapolis, MN
ShellyW
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Post by ShellyW »

Hello, may I read zebrewski the panicky passenger? I think he has 2 lines total, is that correct?
Shelly
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loon
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Post by loon »

ShellyW wrote: April 20th, 2024, 6:59 am Hello, may I read zebrewski the panicky passenger? I think he has 2 lines total, is that correct?
You've got Zewbriski, who has 6 lines - all in chapter 14. The book describes Zewbriski as " a short fat man with a moonface and wearing glasses" - a female reader is fine. You'll read:


Zewbriski read by Shelly Weingart

"Sir, this ship is going to blow up any moment. You've got to save us!"

"And he refused to allow us to escape in the jet boats!"

"Captain,"

"just because my name happens to be Zewbriski, and I have to be the very last to get on a jet boat, I don't see why I have to wait any longer. I demand to be taken off this ship immediately! I refuse to risk my life waiting around for some foolish cadet!"

"They can't leave us here,"

"We'll all be blown to bits!"
Rich Brown - Minneapolis, MN
ShellyW
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Post by ShellyW »

loon wrote: April 20th, 2024, 7:51 am
ShellyW wrote: April 20th, 2024, 6:59 am Hello, may I read zebrewski the panicky passenger? I think he has 2 lines total, is that correct?
You've got Zewbriski, who has 6 lines - all in chapter 14. The book describes Zewbriski as " a short fat man with a moonface and wearing glasses" - a female reader is fine. You'll read:


Zewbriski read by Shelly Weingart

"Sir, this ship is going to blow up any moment. You've got to save us!"

"And he refused to allow us to escape in the jet boats!"

"Captain,"

"just because my name happens to be Zewbriski, and I have to be the very last to get on a jet boat, I don't see why I have to wait any longer. I demand to be taken off this ship immediately! I refuse to risk my life waiting around for some foolish cadet!"

"They can't leave us here,"

"We'll all be blown to bits!"
Perfect, thank you! I have processed my voice to sound more male-ish before. Is that fine if I do that?
Shelly
Shellyweingart.com
loon
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Post by loon »

ShellyW wrote: April 20th, 2024, 9:00 am Perfect, thank you! I have processed my voice to sound more male-ish before. Is that fine if I do that?
OK, give it a shot.
Rich Brown - Minneapolis, MN
loon
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Post by loon »

What? Roger - smarmy?? Say it's not so!
Do you have a chapter 6 to upload?
Rich Brown - Minneapolis, MN
loon
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Post by loon »

OooOoO. VERY smarmy and cocky. I can't wait until he tries to arrange a date at the Mars Hotel (in chapter 11).

Roger pronounces Tom's name "Core-bet" - everyone else says something more like "Core-bit". Is this something Roger is doing to annoy/razz Tom?

In chapter 5 there is a missing line:
I thought this was going to be a battle of blood."
(right after "Gloves?" in the first page of the script.)

Chapters 1, 2,4 and 7 are PL OK. Chapter 5 needs that extra line.
Rich Brown - Minneapolis, MN
Inkell
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Post by Inkell »

Okay so here is chapter 1: https://librivox.org/uploads/toddhw/standbyformars_tom_1.mp3 (4 mins, 45 secs)

Firstly, as per your instructions I did not process it so it has not been noise reduced or cleaned so it does not pass checker and probably does not have the best quality so if you change your mind and want it tidied up let me know because I feel bad the line is so fuzzy and clips in places as I think I was a bit too close to the mic for this recording session, I specifically (and this I still did too) copy and paste the same five second silence between lines to both ensure there is enough space and that the file is nice and clean as I use the same five seconds for the noise cleaning sample.

Secondly, Tom is supposed to be from New Chicago and I did look up Chicago accents but it's not one I'm familiar with or have had much (if any) exposure to it before so I don't think I could do it well. I did still try to put on a different American accent that ended up leaning more Southern, doing it I think naturally pitched my voice a bit lower so I thought it sounded more manly I guess so gravitated towards that but it is kinda drawling and I'm not sure if it's right for Tom and if I should try something else or do my normal voice (which I don't think sounds very American unfortunately). So if you like it or think you need to hear more then let me know because I did record more than the first chapter for this recording session (I'm not sure how many chapters, I recorded for like half an hour though) that is ready to edit or if you don't like it and want me to try something else then let me know because I am perfectly happy to do that (it's why I wanted to send only the first chapter first instead of editing the whole recording section to make sure you're happy with it) I did really like this book and I want it to do it justice :thumbs:
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Post by ShellyW »

Shelly
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loon
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Post by loon »

I'm back from a movie and now have time to listen to the chapter.

I am hearing clipping in many of the loud syllables*, so I think it would be good to re-record the chapter with the microphone gain turned down a bit - or read a little farther away from the microphone, if you think the mic itself is the source of the clipping. Sorry about asking for extra work.

(* I can also see the peaks of the waveform flattened by clipping when I expand the time scale.)

Your 5 seconds of silence between lines will give me plenty of reference noise to do my own noise reduction. That way I'll be able to pick settings that will blend in with whatever noise I find in other voices.

The accent you are using does get a bit like American Southern, which is fine. I don't know for sure where New Chicago is; it may be as far from Chicago as New Amsterdam (Manhatten, New York City, New York, US) is from Amsterdam (Netherlands, EU), so it stands to reason that city would have its own regional accent. I'll be happy with whatever accent you can keep going through all the chapters (including your natural voice, if you decide to use that). Space Academy attracts students from all over, so the one thing we know is they won't all speak in an American Network Television News Anchor voice.

Inkell wrote: April 20th, 2024, 1:54 pm Okay so here is chapter 1: https://librivox.org/uploads/toddhw/standbyformars_tom_1.mp3 (4 mins, 45 secs)

Firstly, as per your instructions I did not process it so it has not been noise reduced or cleaned so it does not pass checker and probably does not have the best quality so if you change your mind and want it tidied up let me know because I feel bad the line is so fuzzy and clips in places as I think I was a bit too close to the mic for this recording session, I specifically (and this I still did too) copy and paste the same five second silence between lines to both ensure there is enough space and that the file is nice and clean as I use the same five seconds for the noise cleaning sample.

Secondly, Tom is supposed to be from New Chicago and I did look up Chicago accents but it's not one I'm familiar with or have had much (if any) exposure to it before so I don't think I could do it well. I did still try to put on a different American accent that ended up leaning more Southern, doing it I think naturally pitched my voice a bit lower so I thought it sounded more manly I guess so gravitated towards that but it is kinda drawling and I'm not sure if it's right for Tom and if I should try something else or do my normal voice (which I don't think sounds very American unfortunately). So if you like it or think you need to hear more then let me know because I did record more than the first chapter for this recording session (I'm not sure how many chapters, I recorded for like half an hour though) that is ready to edit or if you don't like it and want me to try something else then let me know because I am perfectly happy to do that (it's why I wanted to send only the first chapter first instead of editing the whole recording section to make sure you're happy with it) I did really like this book and I want it to do it justice :thumbs:
Rich Brown - Minneapolis, MN
loon
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Post by loon »

ShellyW wrote: April 20th, 2024, 2:05 pm Here's my attempt at zebrewski

https://librivox.org/uploads/toddhw/standbyformars_zebrewski_14.mp3
Well, you're spelling Zewbriski differently from the way it is in the book, but you are pronouncing it fine, and that's the important part!

The utter panic in your voice for "They can't leave us here!" and "We'll all be blown to bits!" is great - Zewbriski is barely able to hold it together.

PL OK, thanks Shelly.
Rich Brown - Minneapolis, MN
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