Tell a joke

Everything except LibriVox (yes, this is where knitting gets discussed. Now includes non-LV Volunteers Wanted projects)
Dulcamara
Posts: 7563
Joined: December 23rd, 2020, 1:14 pm
Location: Barataria

Post by Dulcamara »

maxgal wrote: May 14th, 2023, 2:22 pm I dream of a world where a chicken can cross the road without having her motive questioned.
:lol:
Jasna

Second to the right and then straight on till morning.
txphred
Posts: 73
Joined: June 29th, 2021, 10:40 pm
Location: Nueces county Texas
Contact:

Post by txphred »

Dulcamara

Which Barataria - Sancho Panza's island; Jefferson Parish, Louisiana; or the San Juan neighborhood in Trinidad?
I'm fairly sure it's Sancho Panza's island...
DavidYoung
Posts: 166
Joined: March 3rd, 2020, 1:36 pm
Location: Wrocław, Poland

Post by DavidYoung »

Who didn't invent the aeroplane?

The Wrong Brothers.
Dulcamara
Posts: 7563
Joined: December 23rd, 2020, 1:14 pm
Location: Barataria

Post by Dulcamara »

txphred wrote: May 20th, 2023, 4:31 pm Dulcamara

Which Barataria - Sancho Panza's island; Jefferson Parish, Louisiana; or the San Juan neighborhood in Trinidad?
I'm fairly sure it's Sancho Panza's island...
Ty for the info. I had no idea there were real places with that name! :D
Jasna

Second to the right and then straight on till morning.
maxgal
Posts: 3247
Joined: June 8th, 2019, 10:24 am

Post by maxgal »

Q: Why do ghouls hang around with demons?
A: Because demons are a ghoul's best friend. (whether square-cut or pear-shaped...)
Louise
"every little breeze..."

Fun Fact: 40% of all statistics are wrong.
Dulcamara
Posts: 7563
Joined: December 23rd, 2020, 1:14 pm
Location: Barataria

Post by Dulcamara »

maxgal wrote: May 23rd, 2023, 12:14 pm (whether square-cut or pear-shaped...)
:lol: :lol: :lol:
Jasna

Second to the right and then straight on till morning.
maxgal
Posts: 3247
Joined: June 8th, 2019, 10:24 am

Post by maxgal »

There are 2 kinds of people in this world:
Those who divide the world into 2 kinds of people, and those who don't.
Louise
"every little breeze..."

Fun Fact: 40% of all statistics are wrong.
txphred
Posts: 73
Joined: June 29th, 2021, 10:40 pm
Location: Nueces county Texas
Contact:

Post by txphred »

DEBT, n. An ingenious substitute for the chain and whip of the slave-driver.

THE DEVIL'S DICTIONARY
by Ambrose Bierce
Inkell
Posts: 1178
Joined: July 10th, 2022, 2:52 pm

Post by Inkell »

There are 11 kinds of people in the world: those who understand binary, those who don't and those who understand just enough to get this joke!

-

A man goes into a bar and sees a guy sitting with a dog.
"Does your dog bite?" he asks.
"No," the guy replies.
So the man goes to pet the dog and is bitten.
"Ow!" he cries, "I thought you said your dog doesn't bite!"
"Mine doesn't," the guy says, "but that's not my dog."
GettingTooOld
Posts: 416
Joined: October 19th, 2021, 3:28 am

Post by GettingTooOld »

Inkell wrote: June 1st, 2023, 2:26 am There are 11 kinds of people in the world: those who understand binary, those who don't and those who understand [...]
11 was a racehorse
22 was 12
111 race
and 22112.


(hmm, decided to leave out the spaces, so it's a joke and a riddle perhaps.)
maxgal
Posts: 3247
Joined: June 8th, 2019, 10:24 am

Post by maxgal »

Q: Why don't beavers make good pets?
A: They chew up all the furniture & build dams in your doorways.
Louise
"every little breeze..."

Fun Fact: 40% of all statistics are wrong.
maxgal
Posts: 3247
Joined: June 8th, 2019, 10:24 am

Post by maxgal »

GettingTooOld wrote: June 1st, 2023, 4:03 am
Inkell wrote: June 1st, 2023, 2:26 am There are 11 kinds of people in the world: those who understand binary, those who don't and those who understand [...]
11 was a racehorse
22 was 12
111 race
and 22112.


(hmm, decided to leave out the spaces, so it's a joke and a riddle perhaps.)
:lol:
Louise
"every little breeze..."

Fun Fact: 40% of all statistics are wrong.
maxgal
Posts: 3247
Joined: June 8th, 2019, 10:24 am

Post by maxgal »

After Tuesday, even my calendar says WTF.
Louise
"every little breeze..."

Fun Fact: 40% of all statistics are wrong.
norahnelson
Posts: 658
Joined: February 2nd, 2023, 2:25 pm
Location: Texas

Post by norahnelson »

Last week I installed a skylight in my apartment. The people above me are furious. :mrgreen:
~Norah Leigh ~
Turn to me and be saved, all the ends of the earth! For I am God, and there is no other. Isaiah 45:22
[DR, Children]The Box-Car Children (Male readers needed! 9 small roles open)
[Group, History]In the Days of Queen Elizabeth (Full)
Rapunzelina
LibriVox Admin Team
Posts: 17624
Joined: November 15th, 2011, 3:47 am

Post by Rapunzelina »

A public domain anecdote
The Housekeeper's Weekly tells how a boy was led astray by a misunderstood title.
He was about 8 years old and was looking over the book shelves for something to read. A volume bound in red attracted him. It was Pope's "Essay on Man."
He read it for a few minutes and then threw it down.
"It may be easy on man," he said, "but it's hard on a boy."
Post Reply