ok James, this was quite some hard work for me too....the end result still needs some editing. Took me quite a while to write it all up.
The play itself sounds wonderful though, and all parts are excellentily acted out, and special kudos for Devorah and Tomas who are an excellent pair of rogues
Ok, here is what I found that can/needs to be edited:
>
at 1:14: Miss Harriet Cotton (
an adventurous lady) - you forgot "an adventurous lady". Maybe Foon could still record it quickly, if not, it's probably optional, but it does sound funny to have all those characterizations in a row
>
at 1:28: Mrs. Chargely (
a beneficent lady) - also here, missing the description, maybe we can contact both readers to hand in the missing lines (unless they had them and you only forgot to paste them in)
>
at 2:34-2:37: before "Enter Cutaway" - the
pause is a bit too long for comfort. I think under 2 seconds is fully enough, it feels very long for a listener to wait that long between scenes
>
at 8:53-8:56: before scene 2 - same here:
pause can be cut shorter
>
at 12:12-12:15: before scene 3 - also here
long pause
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at 13:42: "Ha! ha! Bobby, the lady and I understand each other now, don’t we? (
Nudges him.)" - "nudges him" is missing and the break is too long
>
at 19:12-19:15: before scene 4 -
long pause
>
at 19:41: "Hymen has extinguished his
link for the day" - you say "luck" but with "link" it would make pun with the second part of the sentence, being still "unlinked"
>
at 21:13-21:15: before "Miss Brown aside" - long
pause can be shortened
>
at 37:37:
BOLT, MIZZLE, and CUTAWAY. (Together.) - this intro should be cut out, as you merged the voices anyway
>
at 40:52-40:54: before scene 7:
long pause
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at 42:45: before "descend dearest" - actually here you could leave a bit more breathing space, so it doesn't go as fast
>
at 45:16: "No!—and master would. A pretty figure we should have cut" - here is a jump in the audio and "
a pretty" is missing. I'm sure Devorah said it, so the audio was clipped somehow
>
at 45:36-45:42: some lines are jumbled here, you need to make some cuttings and rearranging like this:
Bobby, did I give you the key?
No! (feeling.) No—I have not got it!
The deuce! then we have—
>
at 53:34-53:36: another jumble here in the middle of the sentence: "There is one thing I have not confess’d" - somehow Miss Brown's line "How !" got in there
>
at 54:20-54:39: and another jumble which needs to be cut out. I wonder what happened in the end that these jumblings occured. I'm surprised you didn't notice it at a second listen: "Then, papa, there will be three weddings." is cut by "Come, this troublesome day’s work is well over" which comes later. Tomas' line is missing altogether.
These should be the lines in order:
Then, papa, there will be three weddings.
Yes, we can give away one another.
While Mr. Addison is content with merely being a spectator.
>
at 55:13: the
end disclaimer is totally missing and don't forget the
5 seconds at the end
Still some work to do, I'm afraid. But we're very close to finishing now.
Sonia
That's very interesting! 