OPEN[PLAY]The Tender Husband by Steele - thw

Plays and other dramatic works
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ToddHW
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Post by ToddHW » May 28th, 2019, 3:45 pm

Thank you.

Todd

Kitty
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Post by Kitty » May 29th, 2019, 2:53 am

EmmaHatton wrote:
May 28th, 2019, 2:18 pm
https://librivox.org/uploads/toddhw/tenderhusband_biddy_3_128kb.mp3 here is act 3 for biddy
ah I was curious about the "other part" of this dialogue. So Biddy is not really insane but rather more incurably romantic :lol: I can imagine someone like Humphrey would find this behaviour insane. It will be a very comical dialogue, great job, Emma.

I only have one very small correction to note:

> at 3:57: "We have both the same passion for one another." - here's a small but significant difference from the original, which I think would benefit from correcting. You say "passion for another", which is giving away the game too fast. Biddy says "for one another", meaning that they both hate each other, but the aunt misinterprets this as "loving passion" for one another and that's why she is so happy. She wouldn't react that way if Biddy had told her they both had a passion for someone else.

the rest is totally fine !

Thanks

Sonia


Kitty
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Post by Kitty » May 29th, 2019, 12:58 pm

excellent job there, Foon :lol: :clap: wonderfully prim but easily fooled. I loved the whole performance. All PL ok also, nothing missing at all. :thumbs: thanks so much !

Sonia

EmmaHatton
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Post by EmmaHatton » May 29th, 2019, 1:58 pm


Kitty
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Post by Kitty » May 29th, 2019, 2:04 pm

thank you, Emma, now perfectly PL ok :)

Sonia

EmmaHatton
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Post by EmmaHatton » May 30th, 2019, 2:14 pm

question about act four: does Biddy say the sonnet?

ToddHW
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Post by ToddHW » May 30th, 2019, 2:23 pm

EmmaHatton wrote:
May 30th, 2019, 2:14 pm
question about act four: does Biddy say the sonnet?
No - Clerimont does - he says he has the words by heart. MW indicates he does it.

Thanks, Todd

Kitty
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Post by Kitty » May 31st, 2019, 4:54 am

Todd: Fainlove is ready for your scrutiny. Actually having a sore throat helped a bit here to get my voice darker for the purpose. I tried to differentiate with the parts where I talk to Clerimont alone, so there I'll have a really higher voice.

I absolutely loved the lover's assault in the 5th act, where she deploys all her charms. If I overdid the panting and kissing, please let me know. I may have gotten carried away by the heat of the moment maybe. :lol: TJ won't be able to resist my charm ! :twisted:

https://librivox.org/uploads/toddhw/tenderhusband_fainlove_1_128kb.mp3
Recording time: 2:58 min.

https://librivox.org/uploads/toddhw/tenderhusband_fainlove_3_128kb.mp3
Recording time: 1:18 min.

https://librivox.org/uploads/toddhw/tenderhusband_fainlove_5_128kb.mp3
Recording time: 3:33 min.

Oh and check out that final scene after Mrs Clerimont swoons, I was a bit puzzled by that. So if I understand it right, the wife swoons after she reads the letter, then Clerimont is remorse-stricken and kisses her. Then he turns to Fainlove, praises her for her great performance and kisses her too. What I don't understand is why he calls her Jenny here. Jenny was the wife's maid, Fainlove's name was Lucy. :hmm: Is this an error in the script, or am I missing a point here ? At this point the wife revives, sees this and notices what's up and that her gallant was the husband's mistress all along and she wants to kill her. But then Clerimont interposes to save Fainlove (how nice of you) and he says: "run away, Jenny". Again...that's what I don't understand. I am inclined to think he should have said "Lucy" on both occasions. It doesn't make sense that he would talk to Jenny all of a sudden. She wasn't even in the room at that point. It was a secret rendez-vous between Fainlove and the wife.

Sonia

ToddHW
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Post by ToddHW » May 31st, 2019, 5:24 am

I have to be out of touch for a few days. I'll explore this when I return.

If possible, I'll listen to your Fainlove files and try to figure out what is going on before I shut down here. Certainly am curious about it!

Thanks, Todd


Kitty
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Post by Kitty » June 1st, 2019, 2:54 am

thank you Emma, glad to see a happy ending for Biddy :) she is really a bit too romantic for her own good :lol:

I have a couple of notes here:

for Act 4:

> at 1:07: "Sure I have heard that voice somewhere." [Aside. - could you leave here a longer pause, before this line, please ? The aside belongs to this sentence. Often in old plays the asides get placed after the sentence they refer to.

> at about 1:12: missing line: "But what's the mild air?"

for Act 5:

> at 0:19: "under the title of the loves of Clerimont and Parthenissa."- here you again say "Parthenzia", instead of Par-then-nis-sa. ;)

> also just as a suggestion for further recordings of drama... please also always leave enough space at the end of your recordings. You break off so abruptly in each of your files. It's much easier for the editor to cut out the final sentence if he has a bit of space after that one as well ;) while it's not so important to leave the standard 5 seconds for drama, at least one second wouldn't hurt

thanks !

Sonia

EmmaHatton
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Post by EmmaHatton » June 1st, 2019, 10:06 am


Kitty
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Post by Kitty » June 1st, 2019, 11:02 am

thank you, Emma, excellent corrections again :) PL ok now. Biddy is done and dusted !

Sonia

lymiewithpurpose
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Post by lymiewithpurpose » June 2nd, 2019, 11:32 am

Campbell
Constructive criticism always welcome

Readers wanted: The Cliff-Dwellers

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