OPEN[PLAY]The "Mind The Paint" Girl by Pinero - thw

Plays and other dramatic works
Post Reply
ToddHW
LibriVox Admin Team
Posts: 8777
Joined: August 14th, 2011, 4:24 am
Contact:

Post by ToddHW » July 27th, 2019, 6:09 pm

Thank you.

Any questions?

Todd

alanmapstone
Posts: 1135
Joined: February 15th, 2012, 12:20 pm
Location: Oxford

Post by alanmapstone » July 30th, 2019, 8:04 am

alan
the sixth age shifts into the slippered pantaloon with spectacles on nose

ToddHW
LibriVox Admin Team
Posts: 8777
Joined: August 14th, 2011, 4:24 am
Contact:

Post by ToddHW » July 30th, 2019, 12:24 pm

Thank you.

Todd

Kitty
LibriVox Admin Team
Posts: 18185
Joined: March 28th, 2014, 5:57 am

Post by Kitty » August 6th, 2019, 7:05 am

wohooo, excellent characterization, Alan ! Stidulph as the old hen-pecked husband who now regrets that he fell into the trap of an actress. Disillusioned somehow, right at the end when he tries to caution Farncombe. Nicely done.

Only one thing:

> at about 0:27: you missed all the group lines for the Men:

> Many happy returns of day! Many happy returns of the day! Many happy returns of the day!
> Ha, ha, ha!
> Many happy returns of the day!

it's specifically mentioned that at this point Stidulph joins the crowd, so maybe you could give us a few more lines here to insert into the group.

The rest is perfect :thumbs: thank you so much !

Sonia

alanmapstone
Posts: 1135
Joined: February 15th, 2012, 12:20 pm
Location: Oxford

Post by alanmapstone » August 7th, 2019, 8:36 am

alan
the sixth age shifts into the slippered pantaloon with spectacles on nose

ToddHW
LibriVox Admin Team
Posts: 8777
Joined: August 14th, 2011, 4:24 am
Contact:

Post by ToddHW » August 7th, 2019, 8:44 am

Thank you.

Todd

Kitty
LibriVox Admin Team
Posts: 18185
Joined: March 28th, 2014, 5:57 am

Post by Kitty » August 7th, 2019, 8:55 am

alanmapstone wrote:
August 7th, 2019, 8:36 am
Stidulph with added lines
https://librivox.org/uploads/toddhw/mindthepaintgirl_stidulph_2.mp3
thank you, Alan, now all is in. Somehow Stidulph's laugh is not very heartfelt :lol: The poor man must really dislike such parties.

PL ok now

Sonia

jeugenet
Posts: 15
Joined: July 7th, 2019, 5:39 pm

Post by jeugenet » August 9th, 2019, 2:47 pm


Kitty
LibriVox Admin Team
Posts: 18185
Joined: March 28th, 2014, 5:57 am

Post by Kitty » August 10th, 2019, 3:17 am

jeugenet wrote:
August 9th, 2019, 2:47 pm
https://librivox.org/uploads/toddhw/mindthepaintgirl_carltonsmythe_2_128kb.mp3
2:46
my upload for carlton smythe
james thomas
thanks, James, this was another excellent performance. The feat of plodding through the dozen variants of "I'm going to wash my hand" without smirking is a marvel to me :lol: And I especially love the cheerful joviality when Smythe meets the girls :thumbs: well done.

I only have two small notes to correct:

> at 0:02: for the voice credit, please always include the full description, which you can find in the Magic Window, in this case: "Carlton Smythe, Manager of the Pandora Theatre, read by..."

> at 0:07: "Ha, Lal !" - I may be mistaken but I think you simply say "hello" here. It's more like he is pleasantly suprised and greeting Lal at this point. (sort of like conveying "Ha ! hey, Lal old boy, there you are !")

> one general note: while you left just enough space (barely one second, for example at 1:52, there is a whole speech by someone else in-between and you only left half a second pause) for our editor to copy and paste the pieces into the masterfile, it would be better if you really left plenty, maybe 2 seconds between each chunk, even when only a minor stage direction (like "sits down") interrupts your sentence. It's easier for Todd to handle the editing then, which is tricky enough as it is. No need to insert more space this time, as I think he will manage with the space, but it's something to consider for the future recordings

thank you again for your participation :9:

Sonia

jeugenet
Posts: 15
Joined: July 7th, 2019, 5:39 pm

Post by jeugenet » August 10th, 2019, 1:26 pm

Thank you for the feedback I truly appreciate it. I’m finding it tougher to be a newbie than I thought it would be. To me it’s like acting almost in a vacuum. There are no actors to react to and no direction from the director. When I play a part on stage the stage directions are just part of my character and are just natural in the flow of the dialogue. I have to learn a different technique for voice acting .And I hope this will come with more parts. Also, I’m not sure how other voice actors perceive their performance, but I think of it as performing the part of Carleton Smythe rather than reading the part of Carleton. I’m creating the scene in my mind as I do it rather than focusing on the words appearing on the page. Perhaps you have some suggestions to facilitate the technique of voice acting. The process of stage acting is quite ingrained in me and sometimes I just get carried away rather than focus on the page. Thanks again for your feedback I truly appreciate it. I look forward to my next attempt. James Thomas

ToddHW
LibriVox Admin Team
Posts: 8777
Joined: August 14th, 2011, 4:24 am
Contact:

Post by ToddHW » August 10th, 2019, 5:49 pm

The reason I do not more actively direct - asking for specific accents or characterizations or even gender - is that I love the results from giving you all free reins. We end up with a truly collaborative performance, everyone providing their own best idea of how their role should be played. It is always different than I might have pictured the play being staged, often very surpising, and usually a far more wonderful performance than anyone would expect from a group of physically isolated readers.

You say "I’m not sure how other voice actors perceive their performance, but I think of it as performing the part of Carleton Smythe rather than reading the part of Carleton." I 100% agree with this. I am waving my arms around, crouching, shouting (and redoing the lines if they clip) and whispering as I record. I hear the interacting parts - usually incorrectly - but still there to guide me.

You then say "I’m creating the scene in my mind as I do it rather than focusing on the words appearing on the page." Well, the scene is in my mind too, but if I do have to be a dictatorial director, I do have to demand fidelity to the author's words (within the scope of our standard PL). That's what we do here at Librivox, bringing these authors back to life for our audience.

Isn't it great?

Thanks, Todd

Kitty
LibriVox Admin Team
Posts: 18185
Joined: March 28th, 2014, 5:57 am

Post by Kitty » August 11th, 2019, 1:32 am

Hi Thomas,

well, Todd already replied extensively in his previous post and I can just reinforce his ideas here, but let me say it in my own words.
jeugenet wrote:
August 10th, 2019, 1:26 pm
To me it’s like acting almost in a vacuum. There are no actors to react to and no direction from the director.
as for directions, it's true, apart from the stage directions you have to "create" your character yourself, but you manage brilliantly. And if you wish you can always ask constructive feedback. At least in the dramas I'm PLing, you can be sure I will give my two-cents worth :lol: I probably was a stage-director in one of my previous lives. :mrgreen:

As to "no other actors", this does not have to be. Unless you record your lines right at the beginning, you will have some other voices already to listen to when you start. You could download some parts and listen to how they deliver their lines. It might help you give you an idea to play your part, or maybe it will completely throw you off the track. :wink: But it might make for an interesting amalgam.

I completely agree with Todd...I have listened to many dozens of plays already as DPL and I am still always amazed at the end when it all comes together so nicely. We have a core of voice actors now in our troupe which participate in nearly every project together now, so many of them already know how the others will sound and react in certain scenes, so I really think we are getting better and better with time. And you should not worry at all, you are totally fitting in here. :thumbs:
I think of it as performing the part of Carleton Smythe rather than reading the part of Carleton.
absolutely ! Just like Todd, I am budging around as much as my microphone allows me. (too much and there will be bumping noises, so that's a bit of a restriction). And I totally get immersed in my character, so much so that I need to be careful what role I take. I can confess to being a bit too emotional, and I remember one particular role where I had to do a very sad speech and I'm not sure if one can hear it in the final result, but I was really sincerely crying at the end of the recording, tears just streaming down my face and my voice choking, I was so much into it. I was considering redoing those lines but got convinced by others that I should just leave the genuine deal in. I guess I wouldn't need the help of "tears-make-up" in a studio, I would just simply cry on stage or in front of the camera, if needed. :|
The process of stage acting is quite ingrained in me and sometimes I just get carried away rather than focus on the page.
the only thing I can say is you can learn to "whisper" in an audible voice and "scream" in a lower voice so as not to clip the audio. That's something I had to train myself too in the beginning, but it comes with practice and when you watch the audio waves while recording. See it as a challenge, here the audience will ONLY have our voices to get into the play so we need to do it all with that, they won't see your facial expression, so you need to have the smile in your voice when you say something funny, for example. But again, I think you're doing great, so I don't really think you need my advice.

Oh concerning the long breaks in between...this is for the editor's convenience but it doesn't mean you have to make long breaks while you perform you role. This is the perks of an editing program. You can leave a short pause, so you stay in your character, but when you relisten to it all to edit out the stumbles and stuff, then make sure you copy a 2-second sample of room-silence and paste it in the slots where there are other people speaking or where there are stage directions inside your speech. That way, your chunks are all nicely apart to fiddle with for the editor, and you didn't have to make unnatural pauses while you perform.
I look forward to my next attempt.
and so do I :9: And there are many Pineros more to come, so watch out for those !

Just a small Spot correction and your job in this one is done ;) (just a question: did you reupload and forgot to tell me ?) See you in the next then.

Sonia

silverquill
Posts: 10000
Joined: May 25th, 2013, 9:11 pm
Location: Pittsfield, New Hampshire USA

Post by silverquill » August 11th, 2019, 9:49 pm

Enjoyed reading all of your comments above! This collaborative experience really is something unique!
We've got some emotional, and hilarious, scenes in this play. Foot kissing, dancing and prancing, oh my.

Well, I bit the bullet and edited Act II narrator with corrections I had recorded so I hope this will put it in the OK category.
I will finish editing the last two acts this week, if all goes well.

https://librivox.org/uploads/toddhw/mindthepaintgirl_stagedirections_2_128kb.mp3 50:08

Here are the NEW timestamps.

> at 2:39: “next to old Arthur” – this is definitely Cooling speaking, not the narrator can be cut

> at about 4:26: missed line: “Reading”

> at about 4:44: missed line: “Roper whistles”

> at 6:09: missed line: “Smythe, a silk hat on the back of his head, an overcoat on his arm—regarding the preparations with disgust.” instead you have another line here, starting with “von Rettenmayer enters at the door….” which can be cut as it’s repeated at the right spot at 8:10

> at about 18:24: missed line: “shaking hands”

> at about 21:24: missed line: “Smythe to Lily”

> at about 28:34: missed line: “To Roper”

> at about 28:42: missed line: “singing”

> at about 32:32: missed line: “bowing to Mrs Stidulph”

> at 35:12: Lily: “to the others” – this is Lily speaking, can be cut

> at 35:19: “another follows with the ices” – you forgot “follows” which makes it sound a bit strange

> at 42:33: Lily walks away from Farncombe – you say “walks away with”

> at 49:04: “out at the right-hand door at the back” – you say “and back”

Kitty
LibriVox Admin Team
Posts: 18185
Joined: March 28th, 2014, 5:57 am

Post by Kitty » August 12th, 2019, 3:46 am

silverquill wrote:
August 11th, 2019, 9:49 pm
Well, I bit the bullet and edited Act II narrator with corrections I had recorded so I hope this will put it in the OK category.
it's definitely PL ok now, Larry and thank you again for the new time-stamps :9: I'm grateful for any help that makes the Spot PL easier.

Thank you. Now Todd can start assembling another act. 8-)

Sonia

jeugenet
Posts: 15
Joined: July 7th, 2019, 5:39 pm

Post by jeugenet » August 12th, 2019, 4:40 pm


Post Reply