Section 2 sounds great! Your expressiveness in the dialogue brought home the drama of the story. There are just some edits to be made:
- Could you amplify the volume to between 88-92, as noted above?
- At 1:16, you say "sacredly," then correct it to "scarcely." Could you delete the "sacredly"?
- At 1:23, you say "it would have been perhaps" before correcting it to "it would perhaps have been."
- At 2:10, you start to say "rela-" before correcting it to "reality."
- At 2:17, you say "the strain was so-" before correcting it to "was such."
- At 2:35, you start to say "extrem-" before correcting it to "extremity."
- At 2:41, "turned in disgust," you say "turned into disgust." I mention such a minor difference only because it changes the meaning of the sentence.
- At 2:49, "had he not," you say "he had not," which changes the meaning of the sentence.
- At 3:15, you start to say "charpoy" before saying it again.
- At 3:36, you say "such a-" before correcting it to "such was."
- At 3:52, "lustreless," you say "lustrous."
- At 4:28, "pallor," you say "parlor."
- At 4:50, you start to say "She rea-" before correcting it to "She roused."
- At 5:57, "I told ayah," you say "I told you ayah."
- At 6:12, "her watching eyes," you repeat "her watching."
- At 6:22, in "And even he did not guess what courage underlay the words," you say "did not dis-" before correcting it, and "his words."
- At 6:46, you say "dropped less" before correcting it to "drooped less."
- At 7:50, you say "and it was" before correcting it to "and the next."
- At 8:07, you repeat "He clasped."
- At 8:13, you start to say "and it-" before correcting it to "and the look it wore."
- At 8:35, you start to say "His qui-" before correcting it to "His voice quivered."
- At 9:30, you say "was upturned" before correcting it to "was still upturned."
- At 9:45, you say "I may not be-" before correcting it to "even be with you."
- At 9:55, "give himself up to securing," you say "give himself up to securely."
- At 10:22, you repeat "so little."
- At 10:40, you start to say "Captain Grange" before correcting it.
- At 11:03, you start to say "quivering" before correcting it.
- At 12:01, you repeat "seems so."
- At 12:30, "She clung to his arm," you say "He clung to his arm."
- At 12:43, "moved before," you say "moved forward."
- And at 13:34, you say "End of The Way of an Eagle by Ethel M. Dell," but that's not actually needed until the last chapter of the book.
Here's some information on editing in Audacity:
https://wiki.librivox.org/index.php?title=Deleting_Errors_in_Audacity
Also, I heard in the file that you gave your reader name as Katie Benjamin and just wanted to check that that's the correct spelling that you'd like to appear in the LV catalog.