LORELEI OF THE RED MIST by Leigh Brackett - philc

[loon]

P.S. I love listening to this kind of story without cheating and reading ahead in the text. That way I can get the same experience as the LibriVox listener will have: guessing, guessing, guessing.

[philchenevert]

The entire world is very well thought out and beautiful to imagine. This story is the most enjoyable and exciting one for me so far.

Part 1 fixed and uploaded.
Part 2 edited and ready.

Part 1 is PL OK. I've adjusted the link in the Magic Window.

Part 2 - two optional suggestions
1) check the pronunciation of "unobtrusively" at about 2:36
2) at around 15:16 perhaps change "cut your throat before Beudag comes in" to "cut your throat before Beudag came in" (make it past tnese??)

I see what you mean about this story! Strange things are going on. And, with the long swords and scantily-clad bodies, I could almost believe we're on Barsoom and not Venus.

Part 2 fixed. I left 'unobstrusively' as it was but did change the tense of the second problem. It does make more sense that way.
The big beautiful powerful women seem part of Brackett's story telling vocabulary. And she likes 'em half naked too. Just wait, this story gets even stranger and stranger and more compelling. I challenge you to see if you can pick where her part leaves off and Bradbury's starts.

[loon]

Revised Part 2 - PL OK.

I'm not picking up on Bradbury's style yet.

Romna reminds me of Magnifico from Asimov's Foundation series. A lot. We shall see - but I'm keeping a very careful eye on Romna. (Checking copyright dates - yes, Foundation came along later than Lorelei.)

[philchenevert]

Part 3 is ready. Romna ... yes... he is interesting. (Although fey apparently?). The harping is going to intensify in the next three parts.. and things get even weirder.

[loon]

Part 3 is ready. Romna ... yes... he is interesting. (Although fey apparently?). The harping is going to intensify in the next three parts.. and things get even weirder. :shock:

Part 3 - PL OK. Thank you Phil, I'm having a great time!

"I'll show you something - look." (Rann)
"End of Part 3" (Phil)
You're just teasing me - and future listeners.

[loon]

I see that Part 4 is here already as well!

[loon]

Part 4 - PL OK.

Bodies - dead bodies - everywhere. Things are looking bleak for Stark.

[philchenevert]

I see that Part 4 is here already as well!

Oh yes. The plot thickens and churns and decays just a bit. Lots of dead bodies. About the authors, my gut feeling is that Bradbury started with 'I have an idea'. That was jarring and not like Brackett at all ..... I think.

On a side note, I very recently discovered that I have Attention Deficit disorder. Two of my children and most of my grandchildren have been taking medication for years for this problem. It never dawned on my until a month ago that my inability throughout life to work at a task for more than 10 minutes without getting distracted, walking around, going to the bathroom, etc. might indicate the same mental problem. At the tender age of 80 I have found that a tiny amount of medicine clears up my mental sluggishness, the fog disappears and I can work for much longer periods without getting agitated and needing to get up. Tasks that appeared overwhelming normally, now are not daunting at all. Amazing. I can now edit for 20 and 30 minutes at a time, and stay focused, something I could never do before. Hence, the stories coming much faster these days. Better living Through Chemistry, eh? Where was this stuff when I was in high school and struggling. ... and failing

[philchenevert]

aaaaand t he final part is in the can.
Now I am off to start the original Peter Pan.

[loon]

I’ll have something to look forward to — but first, a nice spring day walk.

[loon]

Part 5 - two notes.

At ~4:47 you say, "Linni smiled secretly" - the text, "Linni smiled sincerely" See if you want to change this.

At ~ 7:32 a missed edit - "Then the light-fish paused....pulsed away." You'll want to remove 'paused'.


The language in this story has changed - it's more florid/ornate, with lots of words strung together which might - or might not - belong next to each other. There's definitely revenge. Cold. Dead. Revenge.

I'm heading onward to hear the exciting conclusion.

[philchenevert]

Part 5 - two notes.
At ~4:47 you say, "Linni smiled secretly" - the text, "Linni smiled sincerely" See if you want to change this.
At ~ 7:32 a missed edit - "Then the light-fish paused....pulsed away." You'll want to remove 'paused'.
The language in this story has changed - it's more florid/ornate, with lots of words strung together which might - or might not - belong next to each other. There's definitely revenge. Cold. Dead. Revenge.
I'm heading onward to hear the exciting conclusion.

Part 5 edits fixed. Very easy. You are an excellent DPL Rich, giving me exact locations.

Some words seem very oddly put together. Obviously we are reading Bradbury here and the language is ..... odd. But i still love it.

[loon]

Part 6 is PL OK.

Whew! For a moment there I feared Rann had transported herself into Beudag's body. The mind control bit is bad enough.

I'll now go back and spot check part 5.

[loon]

And Part 5 is now Spot PL OK - that's it; the magic window is 100% green. Time to go public with another LV book.

You picked real cliff hanger moments for the breaks between parts - all the better to make sure listeners don't do anything frivolous like pause at the end of a section to have lunch or suchlike. Nope - everyone has to listen to the three hours straight through.

Thanks for taking me on this - rather strange - adventure! So much fun.

[philchenevert]

Hey Rich, that's my job: to keep you entertained and listening to strange things.
Thanks again.
EDIT: I'm no going to tell you how I picked the breaks. It is a trade secret or maybe something I picked up from all those Saturday matinee westerns I watched as a kid.