COMPLETE : Hemlock Avenue Mystery by Roman Doubleday -jo

Roger · Post by **Roger** » October 9th, 2018, 9:25 am

Chapter 19 has been posted.
Talk about a cliffhanger.

Sonia, if you have a lot going on, please put this on the back burner. There's no rush to PL, your other projects should take priority.
Thanks so much for all you do.

Post by **Kitty** » October 10th, 2018, 4:36 am

Roger wrote: ↑
October 9th, 2018, 9:25 am
Chapter 19 has been posted.
Talk about a cliffhanger.

"I am not your wife"

I was like WHAAAAT ?!!! So her previous husband is not dead yet ? How come ? Cliffhanger indeed. Now I'm really curious about the next chapter, which probably has an explanation.

Sonia, if you have a lot going on, please put this on the back burner. There's no rush to PL, your other projects should take priority.
Thanks so much for all you do.

yes sorry, there was quite a lot of backlog PL jobs these last few days. But I'm enjoying this book too much to let you wait long

Thanks again for a perfectly read chapter. PL ok.

Sonia

Roger · Post by **Roger** » October 19th, 2018, 10:41 am

Sorry to keep you in suspense so long, but now chapter 20 is ready for a listen, at your convenience of course.

Thanks!

Post by **Kitty** » October 20th, 2018, 11:00 am

the sleaze !!!!

I mean Vanderburgh. I had to re-read that section where Lyon met him when they had the accident. And how Vanderburgh insisted to be buried anonymously. Now I know why: he wanted to keep his wife thinking she was in the wrong and still married to him. What an awful person. Even after his death he wants to control her. I'm outraged.

Still...the chapter was interesting, now we have a lot unravelled but are still not any closer to the murderer...

I really must admit I have no hunch yet.

I found a tiny stumble in one of the sentences, but it's up to you if you want to correct it:

> at 15:13: "when yesterday a man came to see me" - you insert a surplus "to" here between "man" and "came"

thanks for another nice reading

Sonia

Roger · Post by **Roger** » October 20th, 2018, 6:22 pm

Good catch, Sonia. I should have picked that up during editing. Guess I'm losing it.

Chapter 20 has been fixed up and re-uploaded.

Thanks!

Post by **Kitty** » October 21st, 2018, 4:40 am

I'm always baffled by how flawless you make the sound of the new sentence match the old. Excellently PL ok now.

Sonia

Roger · Post by **Roger** » October 26th, 2018, 8:17 am

Chapter 21 has been posted. Enjoy!

Thanks.

Post by **Kitty** » October 26th, 2018, 10:32 am

oho ! now Grandpa Wolcott has moved up to be my prime suspect in this matter, simply by so radically denying he ever saw that cane.

I hope I'm wrong, because the man seems to be a nice guy. But he would have a motive, since he might want to protect Edith from blackmail, if he found out about the letters.

Although, using Lawrence's cane would have been a bit mean, unless he didn't want Edith and Lawrence to get together either.

This section was highly interesting and PL ok of course.

Thanks, and have a nice weekend ! My one-week-holiday has started now

Sonia

Roger · Post by **Roger** » November 1st, 2018, 10:47 am

Chapter 22 has been posted. That infernal cane!

Thanks!

Post by **Kitty** » November 2nd, 2018, 6:16 am

ah the cane gets eliminated. Even though when Old Woolcott spoke about how he broke the cane over a fierce terrier who always picks on smaller dogs, I seriously thought he meant it as a confession in disguise, by meaning Fullerton with the terrier.

I'm still not 100% convinced, but I guess in the end it will be someone else. But who ? I just hope it's not someone that has not yet appeared. I always find that disappointing because then the reader had no chance to guess.

I have two small notes here:

> at 14:58: "The dandies carried them for dress canes when they went beauing the young ladies in those days." - you said "went behind", this sounds a bit like dogs sniffing after females

I don't think the old gentleman would use such a term to tell his story. A "beau" is so much more delicate a word to use. I never knew it as a verb but I guess one can use it as verb too "to beau the lady", probably meaning "to woo the lady" or present yourself as her beau ?

> at 19:06: "you took it in mistake for your own" - you say "took it in by mistake" - a bit of a change of meaning, but this one may be trivial and not worth correcting. Your choice

Sonia

Roger · Post by **Roger** » November 2nd, 2018, 11:35 am

As you know, I will offer no insight into the conclusion of this story.

I had to laugh at your comment about the dandies carrying canes 'behind' the young ladies. It does conjure up an image, doesn't it?

The second gaff might have been just as well off left alone, but I fixed it in order to remain consistent with the text, which I always prefer to do.

So - both errors have been repaired, and the chapter 22 has been re-uploaded, ready for your experienced eyes and ears at your convenience.

Thanks!

Post by **Kitty** » November 2nd, 2018, 12:59 pm

Roger wrote: ↑
November 2nd, 2018, 11:35 am
As you know, I will offer no insight into the conclusion of this story.

and I would not want you to. It irks me that I don't know beforehand. But maybe one of my hunches proves right in the end. I had so many though

I had to laugh at your comment about the dandies carrying canes 'behind' the young ladies. It does conjure up an image, doesn't it?

indeed

seriously, this blooper entertained me just as much as your previous food-bloopers in Ravenspur

both errors perfectly patched and now PL ok.

Thanks !

Sonia

Roger · Post by **Roger** » November 7th, 2018, 10:55 am

As we near the end of this tale, chapter 23 is now provided for your PL.
Kitty .... is back!

Thanks!

Post by **Kitty** » November 8th, 2018, 12:41 am

well well well, if this isn't a coup de théâtre !

It wasn't murder but an accident in self-defense all along. If we can believe in this innocent motives of Kittie of course.

She might play the role of the innocent here. But now, this probably has a happy-ending for Lyon and Kittie, so it will all get sorted out. And nobody is really mourning Lawrence anyway, hard but true.

And the last chapter is in our reach

This could get finished over the weekend !

Excellent reading again. I found two small textual deviations, and they do convey something different, but each time the sentence and statement is just as valid the way you said it, so I'm inclined to give you the PL ok immediately.

Here are the two errors, and you can decide for yourself if you want them changed:

> at 9:26: “He feared she would faint,” – you say “she feared”

> at 20:21: “I guess I know what is proper.” – you say “you know”

Thanks

Sonia

Roger · Post by **Roger** » November 8th, 2018, 8:21 am

Looks like I've moved on from food bloopers to pronoun bloopers.

Although you marked this as PL OK, I went ahead and fixed both errors, if you'd like to do a quick spot check just to make sure all is well.

Good catches both, you are remarkably meticulous, and this reader appreciates that very much!